Wednesday, March 1, 2017

More Helpful Hints, for a Happy Wife,Happy Life!

Yes gents, I do know it has been awhile since my last post giving you those hints to have a happy wife,happy life. Sorry, but my last venture kept me in the intensive care unit longer than usual...

Okay, the wife has just made a wonderful casserole, lots of gooey stuff, like cheese. She has decided the dishes can wait till the next day. The next day rolls around, and she has decided she needs a brazilian wax job. She politely ... asks you to wash the dishes from the night before. Don't panic! Wait till she leaves, box those dishes up, take them to your workshop, and break out the handy dandy sand blaster. Those dishes will be cleaner than they have ever been. 
Just a little note here, if a sand blaster isn't available, a hand grinder works, as will a belt sander!

The wife arrives home, and while getting the nether regions assaulted by an amazon named Myrtle, your wife has decided new paint is in order for the living room. She was even thoughtful enough to bring it home with her. Some ungodly color that even she can't pronounce, so calls it "just wonderful".
No problem guys. Hand her 100 bucks, tell her to go buy something nice for herself, you'll take care of it. After she is gone, pull out every piece of furniture from the wall about 1 foot. Just enough so you can roll paint just below the top of said furniture. Do the whole room, put the furniture back. She won't know till Christmas rolls around, when you have to rearrange the furniture to put up the tree. 

Don't panic, this is when you fake a severe back injury. Hell, you may even get a little sympathy out of her. She'll obviously feel sorry for you, and says, "honey, we'll make do". The waiting till she says that may cause an increase in blood pressure, hopefully not enough to give you a stroke. 

Okay, my next tip, nevermind, shes back from shopping... oh shit, she brought paint..........

Monday, February 27, 2017

Seeds, Life From Within

A singular living and wondrous seed
Giving an inner life a chance to  be freed 
some starting in the ground   some blowing through the air
others from within from a love two people share.

It truly is Mother Nature at her very best
Once planted, time takes care of the rest
Maturity for that single seed comes slow
with proper nurturing, it will grow

whether  plant or human, seeds react the same
the ingredients of life a mystery in facts and all blame
As the seed grows, it changes shape and even size
what was once, now we can't even recognize
 That singular seed, now has its form changed forever
Mysterious, and beautiful, Mother nature is so clever?

A beautiful flower, colors bright and clear
A child, with blue eyes and dark hair
Seeds, all life grows from a seed, life from within
the cycle continues and a new life will begin.

Sunday, February 26, 2017

So Where Do We Go From Here?

denoting or relating to a person whose sense of personal identity and gender does not correspond with their birth sex.

a person, typically a man, who derives pleasure from dressing in clothes primarily associated with the opposite sex.
synonyms:    drag queen, cross dresser, female impersonator; 

I use to have a high degree of tolerance for all these people, but find myself at a point that I have almost none at all. I can't even find myself having almost any empathy towards them. I think it is because the mainstream media has been flooded with so many negative stories, as has most Social Media. 

Lately, we have found ourselves being subjected to one news story after another, and usually, it is because someone has supposedly done a wrong to a transgender person. 

The only empathy I can rise to is it must be some sort of living hell, having to not be who you feel you should be. I can only imagine the therapy that would be involved to offer a solution or relief. 

When I started to write this post, I put two definitions as the opening. I did this because there are many who seem to confuse the two. One is what I think is a psychological disorder, the other, I think is an excuse to play dress-up and expect others to think that it is perfectly okay.

The reason I did so, was because many people do not want to accept transgenders, and feel they should not be in the same washroom as their children. I will say that a real transgender person, in my thinking, is not a danger to your children, or even my grand children. They were born the way they were, and don't feel comfortable the way they are. 
I just think that it is hard to accept a teen boy going to use the same bathroom as a teen girl. We can procrastinate all we want, I just don't think it is right. I wish I had a solution to it that would make everybody happy, but I don't. Maybe we need three different washrooms in public places now, Men, Women, and  Transgender.....

As far as Transvestites go, if I was in a public place, and my grand daughter had to use the restroom, and some guy dressed as a woman decided he had to go at the same time, he'd piss himself, because he wouldn't be going where she was.... 

Saturday, July 16, 2016

Been Awhile So I Thought I Might Drop In...

Wow, haven't been here in awhile, I think i need to do some redecorating... maybe later. Anyway I just had a nice shower, 

so I'm Zestfully clean...

Got no dandruff on my Head and Shoulders...........

and I'm wearing my best Colgate smile....

  So things are looking up so far. I have a busy day planned, have some work to do on a website I'm putting together, and I have another planned, that one will take a little while to get online. At least it is keeping me out of trouble.

I also want to put together a short video, I haven't done one of those in a very long time, and I just found a new site with a great video platform, thought I might give it a try.  

While I am here, thought I might mention a new platform, (new to me) that has helped me immensely with my site and all the things it takes to put one together properly, it is called The Wealthy Affiliate, so if any of you ever decide to play online marketing, they are the people that can help you. 

Well folks, that's all I have for now, Hope you All HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND! 

Sunday, January 10, 2016

Illustrated Short Stories for "Kids"..... :)

It would seem, that anyone who ever was once a child, has it in their head, that they can write childrens books/short stories. Well, since i was once a kid, I got to thinking, hell, I should be able to write a childrens short story...... So, here is my first in a series of "Illustrated Short Stories for Children.....   Poor Grandpa>.....
Grandpa is suffering, a bad case of gas

Farting and sputtering sounds right out of his ass…..
poor grandpa!
Though he suffers in silence, the poor old dear

The smell is excruciating, and is polluting the air…..
poor grandpa!
It isn’t because we don’t love him and want him close

But we’d all be better off, if he was comatose…..
poor grandpa!

Well, it’s been a few months that passed by

And poor old grandpa, well, didn’t he die…….

poor grandpa!
Grandpa we miss you, always quick with a zinger

Unfortunetly, that is the wrong finger………. 

I'm thinking my next childrens Short Story will be:
Grandma, Your Too Old for Those "Toys"

The Dangers of Peanut Butter........
Since I've decided to put together short stories for children, I thought maybe I should try and teach the little rugrats things that may help them through life.... I now present "the dangers of peanut butter"............ or, peanut butter can lead to sex........

dangers of peanut butter
Little Roy sure did like to eat

And peanut butter he thought was sweet…..

dangers of peanut butter

His mom would give him peanut butter each day

With his promise of being good and keep quiet and play…..

dangers of peanut butter

Little Roy got some peanut butter on his lap

And Found his dog loved it … and how, holy crap!

 dangers of peanut butter

Sadly, little roys dog up and died…..

Little roy, he cried and cried………

dangers of peanut butter
Looking out his window one summer day

His heart beat faster, and he began to sway
dangers of peanut butter
There was a pretty little girl next door

Maybe she’d like peanut butter like his dog did before….

Yup, peanut butter can be dangerous, and lead to sex................. always wear a condom before using peanut butter........

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Been awhile.

  Greetings and salutations everyone! Been awhile since I have written anything here....... been busy, but I have a little free time now, so here I am. It's been very quiet here lately, and that's a good thing. It was very quiet here this morning when I got up, actually I found it a little too quiet, I could here every sound, from the cats cleaning themselves, right down to the clock ticking..... 

  Cats cleaning themselves is a very annoying sound, much like someone who is smacking their lips and eating loudly....... The clock ticking is a reminder of our little time here on Mother earth, and how fast it can pass us all by.

  Last night my wife went out and did a little shopping. She is very much into the Christmas thingie..... me, I'm not so inclined, but go along with her spirit, because you know what they say, Happy wife.....Happy life! She has thrown several hints the last few days (more like asking outright) for me to put the decorations and lights outside. I've been using the it's too dayum wet out excuse the last few days, because it actually has been, so today I'm going to use it's too dayum cold, because it's actually nice and clear out,so the wet excuse won't work! I'm hoping it works, but she may just become insistent........... 

  My computer has once again decided to be a prick. It's been running very slowly and all the usual tricks and tweaks haven't helped. I even downloaded a few things that are suppose to help, but they haven't. I even went to the support site of the manufacturer, and that didn't help. I'm thinking it's soon time for a new computer......... This one is 5 years old, and hasn't been turned off hardly since I first bought it.

  ..... anyway, I do hope anyone reading has a great day, and wish me luck in the decorations and lights battle I figure I'm going to have!