Recipes

I figure, if you are anything like me, you like to eat now and then. I'm not talking about that fancy smancy stuff, you know what I mean, you go to a fancy restaurant, order some exotic dish, and they bring out a plate that has two sprigs of what looks like grass from your lawn, and something that looks like the chef already chewed it up before you did! Anyway, from time to time, I am going to put some of my recipes here, and no, I ain't no Iron Chef.....I'm better! LMAO!

Lip Smacking Ribs!


 I love pork spare ribs, and I use a rub on them to die for! I only use this rub, if I'm baking them in the oven, if I am bbqing, I use it as a seasoning, before they are done! 
So, here's the rub............. 
1 tbls. of chili powder
1 tbls. cayenne pepper
3 tbls. paprika
3 tbls. garlic powder
1/4 tbls. ground black pepper
1/4 tbls. salt
1/4 cup of packed brown sugar
mix all ingredients, rub into both sides of ribs. 
let sit for about 15 minutes. 
place on a broiler pan and bake at 375 degrees, turning once in awhile. 
Now, just before they are done, use your favorite bbq sauce. place on one side first, and turn oven to broil. Once that side starts to "bubble" turn, and repeat on the other side. 
Now, Time to eat! 
Oh, I usually bake some spuds to go with these, up to you what you want with them! 

If you are BBQing your ribs, when your ribs are almost done, season your ribs with the above rub. First one side, then the other, be careful not to burn your ribs. Oh, and don't forget you BBQ sauce! 

The Paleo Recipe Book






Today's Dish.....Skips Chili!

Ok you ladies and dudes, I'm going to teach you how to make chili, I know, ya think ya know how already! BULLCRAP!


First, you need a pot, a nice sized one!


Now you need some ingredients! well lets start out with the basics, shall we?


1 Medium sized green pepper


1 medium sized red pepper


2 nice stalks of celery


1 sweet vadelia onion(bet you weren't expecting that)


2 cloves of real garlic(not that powdered shit)


1 pound of lean ground beef


11/2 pounds of FRESH TOMATOES (none of that canned crap!)


kidney beans (here you can use that canned crap if you want)


1 small can of tomato paste!


 salt, pepper, and guess what, some sugar, cause tomatoes are bitter!


Don't worry, we'll get to the chili powder, cayanne pepper, and even some paprika!


bottled hot peppers


louisanna hot sauce!


okay, here we go, first, cut the green and red peppers into cubes about 1/2 inch big(you want to be able to taste them, and not have a bunch of mush in your mouth)


now cut the celery into slices, cut it diagnally, not only will it make them pretty , but it looks like ya get more outta the celery!


cut the damn onion, and slice the garlic.


Okay, take the tomatoes, and throw them in the nice sized pot, don't forget to slice and dice them though!Add your kidney beans, and tomato paste, put this on low,  heat them up!


In a pan(I use a stir fry pan) brown the ground beef, add all the vegetables!Fry the beef and veggies, till almost done.


Add the beef and veggies to the other pot(the one with the tomatoes, beans and tomatoe paste! 


throw in some bottled hot peppers, and some louisianna hot sauce.STIR the SOB!


Okay, now this is the IMPORTANT PART!


you have to add chili powder, well add chili powder, till the whole thing takes on a DARK RED color, not that pasty looking red. Now throw in a good 4 or 5 tablespoons of cayanne pepper, and now throw in some paprika(it sorta makes it look pretty, and adds flavour!


SIMMER,SIMMER,SIMMER!


In about an hour, this stuff is ready to eat, and rock your socks off!



Mini Hot Legs!

So, do you like Hot Wings? Well I love them, but many places you buy them, they have the little drumstick sorta thing removed. or even the wing tip. Anyway, I use that little mini drumstick to make what I call Mini Hot Legs.

Just in case you are wondering what I mean by mini drums/legs here's a pic!



Many people fry the whole wing, but for some reason my wife never liked those little drums/legs, so I got in the habit of using them for this recipe!


You really want about a pound or two of them, and they are really only an appetizer, but man! are they good.

Deep fry two pounds of mini drums
mix 3 tablespoons of Chili powder,
 3 tablespoons of cayanne pepper,
 3 tablespoons of paprika,
 2 tablespoons of garlic powder,
 1/4 cup of ketchup
1/4 cup of packed brown sugar
1 tablespoon mustard
a couple squirts of vinegar
salt, pepper,
 and a whole lot of Tabasco sauce!
Spread over the deep fried mini drums, and broil in your oven. 
When they start bubbling...they are done! Enjoy! 

Skips Pizza

Now I know many of you would rather order out, than make your own pizza. Don't you just wish that for once, you'd get a Good Pizza? They aren't really hard to make, and they are always better than what comes in those pizza boxes...not to mention, you don't have to worry about what diseased, grubby paws, made your pizza. Also, if you might have been a little bit of an asshole, trying to understand the person that was taking your order...who knows what foreign substance, may have been baked into your ordered out pizza?  

Okay, shall we make this or what?
 This is a half recipe, because I'm the only one home here, that actually eats much pizza. It makes a 12 inch pizza. Oh, the only thing not halved in the recipe is the yeast! Don't worry, you can use the whole pkg.

 The Crust
1/2 cup of  warm water
1 teaspoon of sugar
1 pkg. of active dry yeast
2-2 1/2 cups of flour
1/8 cup of vegetable oil (you can use virgin olive oil for a softer crust)
1/2 teaspoon of salt

Method
Place the water in a medium sized mixing bowl, stir in the sugar. Sprinkle the yeast on top of the water, and let stand for 10 minutes.
Add the oil and salt, then about 3/4 cups of flour, and stir to a smooth batter. Now, gradually add flour, mixing as you go. The purpose is to end up with a smooth, non sticky ball. 
Knead the dough, about 5 minutes, place  the dough in a well greased bowl, cover, and let rise for an hour. Punch the dough down, after an hour, and cover, let rest for 15 minutes.
It is now ready to use! 

Toppings
Okay, here you can pretty well go crazy. Use whatever you like on your favorite pizzas. Here's what I use:
Green Pepper
Mushrooms
onion
bacon
ground beef
salami
pepperoni
black olives
mozzarella cheese
Parmesan cheese
pizza sauce (use whatever kind you like) I use to make my own, but it's very time consuming
caraway seed (optional)
oregano (optional)

Here's how you put it all together. First, you spread the sauce over the dough, you have spread out evenly in a 12 inch pizza pan. Sprinkle the oregano over the sauce, a well as some caraway seed. 
Spread some onion on the sauce, then sprinkle a generous amount of mozzarella cheese. Now sprinkle some parmesan cheese. Now, add your sliced green pepper, mushrooms, and pepperoni, and salami. Add more Cheese! Now add the bacon, and ground beef, and finally the black olives.

Place your pizza in a preheated to 425 degree oven, and bake. The crust should be a golden brown, and the cheese should be showing some light brown as well. Take the pizza out of the oven, let sit for a couple minutes to settle, and then cut in slices and serve! Don't cut it in too many slices though, I usually only cut it in 4 instead of 8, because I've found I can only eat 4 slices at a sitting! :)